Directed by Brian Pulido
Format: Special Edition DVD
Tagline: “Sometime evil lurks in the most innocent things.”
“According to legend the gnome in Brad and Penny’s garden will protect it, but this gnome is different. An innocent gift turns into a murderous nightmare as the pint-sized slasher takes protecting the garden to a terrifying, relentless extreme.”
I bought this DVD at a comic book store in Seekonk, MA, and I mentioned it in an August edition of The Loot. Little did I know it was a short film, and I was kind of bummed I spent the money that I did on the DVD. But, I mean, it has a murderous gnome. So I don’t mind owning such a DVD. Plus, there’s “Over 90 minutes of programming!” Could be huge, no? A featurette, commentary, actor auditions, bloopers, posters, stills, “gore scenes” and a trailer! A trailer? A trailerrrrrr:
- There can only be so many bullet-points for a 16 minute film.
- This reminds me a lot of Pinocchio’s Revenge. I hope this is better.
- Straight AstroTurf patio.
- Dramatic music as soon as Peggy says “I don’t like it” is a nice touch. Well you know what Pegs, I don’t think the gnome likes your AstroTurf.
- “You could sleep through a terrorist attack.” Jeez, I hope someone would wake you, Brad.
- THERE’S SOMEONE FIXING A LIGHT BULB, WATCH OUT!
- “What’s he doing changing a light bulb in the middle of the night?!” Relax, lady. People have chores to do. Much like you tending to your AstroTurf.
- “Night of the living bread.” I see what you did there, Brad.
- Sweet Jesus, that gnome’s noise is creepy.
- Whoa, get dat shiat out mah faceeeee.
- The gnome absolutely sounds like a dying animal.
- How did that little gnome just drag Brad’s body? A better question: HOW DID A GNOME JUST KILL A HUMAN?
- That’s right Penny, an umbrella should fend him off.
- Oh come on Penny, you didn’t see that the trowel was gonna go through the bedroom door?
- “What do you want?” It just seems like he wants to kill you. I wouldn’t worry about it.
- You covered it with a blanket, then a pillow, then you put him in the hamper. None of that’s working, try another method.
- It looks like a computer-generated gnome arm flailing for help as Penny stabs him with his trowel. She better start digging his grave. HA, get it?
- Or, you can just grill him, that’s cool.
- That gnome just outsmarted all of you. Assholes.
- No way did someone named Jonsey Jones voice the gnome.
Not a bad little short! My comments don’t sound like it was very good, but I liked it. It was a little weak all around, but still entertaining and told a pretty clear story. I wish we got to see a little bit more of the gnome, but that’s alright. That acting was iffy, but short films are hard to write, act, and all together make. I probably won’t watch the 90 minutes of extras, but I’m sure it was a fun movie to make.
You can never have enough AstroTurf or offed characters via murderous gnome in any film, of any length.