Tag Archives: animals

Bambi (1942)

Bambi1989VHSStarring: Hardie Albright, Sam Edwards, Sterling Holloway

Directed by about seven different people

Format: VHS

Bambi. Acknowledged by generations of moviegoers as one of the greatest Disney animated Classics ever produced. This extraordinary movie miracle is most fondly remembered as Walt Disney’s favorite picture. The simple, heartwarming story of the newborn ‘prince of the forest’ reflects the universal joy in us all as we discover the wonders of life and the beauty of nature. Each new revelation, along with Bambi’s budding friendship with bashful Flower and fun-loving Thumper, elevate this beloved Classic to the status of Timeless Masterpiece.”

For my wife and I, a VHS copy of Bambi has more than likely been on our movie shelves our entire lives. When we married and consolidated, we kept a copy and that has been on our shelf for the four years we’ve been married. While discussing the VHS tapes we were going to get rid of before our cross-country move, we realized that neither of us remember ANYTHING about Bambi, and we likely has only seen the film maybe once as children. Let’s watch it.

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Thoughts:

  • The only trailer before the flick was the initial trailer for The Little Mermaid.
  • These early Disney flicks that have what my wife calls “an orchestral establishment of scenery.”
  • Animals are crazy, man.
  • Bambi is a prince? What?
  • Could you imagine waking up in the world and all these little animals were like, “Sup, Prince?” And then a scary ass owl was there.
  • My wife and friends frequently compare my lank and lack of coordination to Bambi trying to walk. “Kinda wobbly, isn’t he?”bambi walking.gif
  • Why won’t the forest creatures just give Bambi some space, jeez.
  • Bambi learning about the world is freaking adorable.
  • AH! The Natalie Merchant/Michael Stipe/Mark Bingham/The Roches version of “Little April Shower” is so good. Just a side note.
  • Wow, the thunderstorm scene is reminding me so much of how scared I was of thunderstorms as a kid. Like, my anxiety was through the roof.
  • The narratives of the early Disney films are so interesting. The story, the environment and the characters are there, but the film takes time to do these other scenes (the thunderstorm, the duckling testing the pond water) for seemingly no reason but to showcase their animation. Such a different time.
  • Thumper is such a troublemaker.
  • All I can think of is The Lion King. I’m waiting for “Circle of Life” to start playing.
  • Oh god, Bambi crying out for “Mother” is just as heartbreaking as I thought it would be.
  • Bambi On Ice would be the worst show ever.
  • If humans sleep a third of their lives away, what’s the percentage for other mammals?
  • Oh man, Bambi’s expectation was that he and mom would have gotten away because they did last time. That makes it worse.
  • “Dad, where were you when we needed you!?!” – Bambi, probably
  • Ornery owl. tumblr_mt41y0IgMx1qg6r11o1_500.gif
  • I remember NOTHING about Bambi going through deer puberty.
  • Also, where the hell was Bambi all this time? He went to find himself after his mom died?
  • TWITTERPATED.
  • “I feel like I always got Flower confused with Pepe Le Pew.” – my wife. Twitterpated skunks, yo.
  • Thumper, more like HUMPer, huh? #twitterpated
  • FALINEEEEE WHAT YOU WANNA DO? I FEEL TWITTERPATED WITH YOU, FOR A WHILE MAYBE LONGER IF I DOOOOOOOO.
  • Bambi’s gotta throw down with Faline’s jealous ex.
  • The fight scene is gorgeous.
  • THAT BIRD JUST KILLED ITSELF. We need mental health access for birds.
  • Bambi will not break the cycle of deer violence if he keeps yelling for Faline.
  • Oh shit, here come the dogs.
  • That hunter probably thought he was the coolest when he shot Bambi mid jump.
  • A FIRE?!?!
  • “DAD, YOU WERE NEVER THERE, STOP YELLING AT ME.” Bambi, again, probably.
  • Only you can prevent forest fires. But you didn’t. Now look at this.
  • Don’t forget that 64 years later, a sequel to Bambi finally came out…

The Verdict:

Just like the original purpose for this blog, we watched Bambi because it has been on the shelf FOREVER. And now we had to consider whether we were keeping it or getting rid of it. This one is a sleeper, but a keeper. Enjoyed it enough, and the flick is short enough, to deem keepable (not a word). Maybe our kids will enjoy watching it on VHS/in general some day.

 

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Frogs (1972)

Starring: Sam Elliot, Adam Roarke, Joan Van Ark, and Ray Milland

Directed by George McCowan

Format: DVD

Tagline: “Today the pond…tomorrow the world!”

“Jason Crocket (Milland) is an aging, physically disabled millionaire who invites his family to his island estate for his birthday party.  The old man is more than crotchety…he’s crazy!  Hating nature, Crockett poisons anything that crawls on his property.  But on the night of his shindig, it’s nature’s payback time, as thousands of frogs whip up every bug and slimy thing into a toxic frenzy until the entire environment goes environ-mental.

My Story:

This is something I wouldn’t usually do. But I’ll do it and it’ll be done in an hour and a half. Much like 976-EVIL, I saw a Frogs t-shirt on Fright-Rags. I thought the poster was one of the funniest things and I HAD to find the movie.  Lucky enough, the library had it.  I took it out and hadn’t watched it for two weeks.  Much like if I had to buy the movie, but it’d probably be more like two months.  This should be good.

My Thoughts:

  • I would hate to go into this movie NOT knowing it was about killer frogs, you know? I could almost feel the disappointment if the title wasn’t so blatantly obvious.
  • I go through reptile infested swamps on canoes all the time.
  • Oh boy, here’s the environmental aspect.  Litter, water pollution, God save us all.
  • Okay opening credits, I understand that the swamp is made up of reptiles and trash.  I get it.
  • Uh oh, drunk motorboating.  Not Wedding Crashers motorboating, but legit motorboat on the open water. He’s gonna slam that guy in the canoe.  Close call.
  • Why are the French subtitles automatically on?
  • Sam Elliot was in all denim when his canoe tipped. That’s god awful.
  • Mr. Pickett Smith? Hahahaha, Will Smith’s wife? No, nevermind.
  • “I have suggested pouring oil in the water to kill them off.” Is it too soon to make a BP joke?
  • If Sam Elliot had his mustache in this movie, it would be so much better.
  • WHO HAS A MOUNTED TIGER HEAD ON THEIR WALL?!?!?!
  • Sam Elliot watch out for the…frogs? Does that sound okay?
  • That property is just a dead animal graveyard.  Frogs and snakes and birds and…PEOPLE?! WTF?
  • That dead guy is Bub from Day of the Dead.
  • The father from Creepshow’s “Father’s Day” should pop in right now.
  • How did that snake get onto the chandelier?
  • 4th of July! Just in time!
  • Gah, there are frogs everywhere! I thought there weren’t gonna be frogs in this movie!
  • American Gladiators jousting on a log with pillows, YES.
  • …why didn’t they just call an exterminator?
  • Stop using the same shot of a frog.
  • The rattlesnake was clearly fangless.
  • If they put in another lengthy shot of Sam Elliot walking in the woods, I’ll cry.
  • I would hate to be an animal wrangler on this film.
  • WHAT?! HOW’D HE GET SHOT?!?!
  • Upon further review, this man shot HIMSELF in the leg, and then was attacked by tarantulas and Spanish moss. And one scorpion.
  • Horrors of Spider Island once again!
  • There are frogs on the croquet field. Not okay.
  • The highest-waisted pants ever seen.
  • This is just the perfect 4th of July movie, Independence Day’s got NOTHING on Frogs.
  • In the words of Dan, a friend of mine, “This is Looney Tunes shit.” A LIZARD just spilled two glass jars marked “Poison” and they erupted in poisonous gas when they hit the ground and asphyxiated the man in red pants, Kenneth. That was THEN surrounded by Geico geckos and salamanders post-death. And THENNNN Sam Elliot walked into the green house and the poison gas had vanished.
  • There have been no frog related deaths as of yet.  But the 4th of July cake now has frogs on it.  Gross.
  • I’m pretty certain this lady is gonna get killed by butterflies in a minute.
  • Woman landed in a puddle, yelled “owwwww” and keeps falling down.
  • Maybe the frogs are the animals in charge of this war on people. Because frogs haven’t attacked anyone yet.
  • A rattlesnake bit this woman Iris, and she already turned green. Immediately.
  • I hope the end credits song is “Amos Moses.” It would go along with the fact that FROGS HAVE NOT ATTACKED A SINGLE PERSON.
  • “He got bit by a snake.” “Is that an accident Grandpa?!” No, he picked up the snake and latched it onto his neck. Suicide. Stupid question.
  • I’m just waiting for some sea monster to kill someone next.
  • There is NOT a bird attack. No. No. IS NOTHING SACRED?!
  • Oh my god, the lizard cut the rope for the boat! Now they’ll never get off the god forsaken dock.
  • There is no way she can see from the porch, through the yard and trees and all the way across the pond to know that guy SOMEHOW got dragged underwater…BY ONE SNAKE.
  • OMG BOWSER is in the water!
  • This film is rated PG, just in case you were wondering.
  • “Watch out for the frogs.” THE FROGS HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING!
  • Really, you’re going to give the youngest kid the shotgun?
  • Watch out for that one snake, he’ll pull you under the two feet of water you’re standing in Sam Elliot.
  • Wow Mr. Crockett, you would lift yourself out of your wheelchair, fall on the ground, only to be surrounded by frogs FOR NO REASON.
  • Zero frog related deaths in that film. Zero.

The Verdict:

Dreadful. Very slow and dragging and, like my last comment, no death by frog.  In a film called Frogs that gets compared to The Birds, the film should PROBABLY be about frogs actually attacking people as opposed to influencing other animals to attack for them.  But I guess the filmmakers were like, “Well…while frogs may scare some people, the can’t do much harm when they’re in some Florida swamp.  Let’s make them fascist dictators and have them rule over all other swamp creatures…and KILL people.” Stupid, stupid, stupid idea. This wasn’t a fun bad movie unfortunately.  Actually, I take that back. Some of it was pretty funny. But it would’ve been funnier if the title and cover weren’t so misleading.  The trailer for the film gives a little more info though…so maybe I should’ve watched that first.

I like how my last line before I started the movie was “this should be good.” Never will I say that again. If this was my movie, it would immediately go on the Self of Shame. No doubt about it.